25 September 2018


Self-esteem is a powerful inner capability that you have or do not.  The definition of self-esteem has been defined as a ‘positive or negative attitude toward … the self’ (Rosenberg 1965, 30); but to pin social/cultural influence on our self-esteem is still open for discussion.

As humans living in a social environment, we tend to gravitate towards things our mind tells us we are capable of getting or achieving and since Self-esteem works with our mind it tends to influence our daily choices (from whom we think we can date, whom we can associate with, what we can wear, and so on).

Most of our negative self-esteem issues arise from the negative feedback we hear without a counter positive boost to help.

    I’ve struggled with negative self-esteem over the years and shrink myself in public spaces to protect the little love I have for myself. I made my blog a very safe place for me to feel confident and comfortable while engaging with different people.
    Recently, after moving to America my self-esteem got to an abysmal point, and I didn’t know who this girl (myself) was anymore, and despite having my blog running, I couldn't help myself out of it and needed to call myself to order.

"but to pin social/cultural influence on our self-esteem is still open for discussion". Tweet this

Ways of boosting your self-esteem
After a brief moment of struggle, I came up with tips to boost my self-esteem.
Write down things you’re confident of and proud to have achieved with minimal or less effort (who benefited from it and how did it made you feel?). This is a very reassuring task to do often, to remind yourself of who you are.

Surround yourself with people that reassure you of your self-worth. Words matter, despite comments about us not being defined by negative feed-backs, we listen to them and our mind makes mountains of the molehill.

Take ownership of your fears, and things that made you feel less. For me, it is the feeling that I wasn’t dateable or beautiful to be loved, that led me to (I decided to ask the questions that were relevant for me know if someone was deserving of me or not) realize that people will form their bias opinions of you but that doesn’t take away your awesomeness.

Change the things you can to boost self-esteem:
 Most individuals have their self-esteem or lack thereof by their physical appearance. For some of us, we don’t hit the societies standard of beauty and that may cause a cognitive dissonance which is why I advise people if you have the means to change how you look and it makes you feel beautiful, then do so (a trend we see with YouTube Influencers). Being confident in your skin can make you function better.

"I advise people if you have the means to change how you look and it makes you feel beautiful, then do so" Tweet this

Accept things you cannot change: I’ve been less confident of my height and body size. Unfortunately, I don’t look my age and have a small body frame for a 24-year-old, and I have come to accept that as my lot. Some of us will never have what we wish for, but we can learn to live with what we’ve been given.

What tips can you add to this?



  1. First time opening and reading your blog... I'm inspired, yes if i had the means i would change a few things on me. Howver, knowing that our situation is sort of similar i feel more confident knowing I'm not the only 24yr old with a small body frame and height. Thank you for this

    1. Hahah, aww I hope you get to visit more often. Having a small body frame is a struggle, but we will be alright.

  2. With havin so much content and articles do you ever run into any problems of plagorism or copyright infringement?
    My blog has a lot of completely unique content I've either
    created myself or outsourced but it appears a lot of it is popping it up all over the internet without my authorization. Do you know
    any ways to help stop content from being ripped off?
    I'd definitely appreciate it.

    1. It is really hard to control the level your content is ripped off. However, for pictures you can add a watermark and on your blog put a word that prohibits people from lifting your content.

  3. Yes. Some times we battle with self esteem so much we sometimes are scared to speak about it. Thanks for sharing your experience.

    1. Self-esteem is a silent killer and I;m glad you appreciate my opinion on it.

  4. Generally I don't read article on blogs, however I would like to say that this write-up very forced me to take a look at and do
    so! Your writing taste has been amazed me. Thanks, very great article.

  5. That is a great tip especially to those fresh to the blogosphere.
    Short but very precise information? Thank you for sharing this one.
    A must read article!


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