“Grace, if I was to make a list on people I’ll invite for a nice time
out, your name may not be on the list; because sometimes energy speaks”.
Happy new month loves, I know it’s been a tranquil moment on my blog
that sometimes I wonder if I’ve exasperated all my creative ideas asides
wearing nice clothes.
The quote that ushered in today’s blog post, is from a conversation I had with a good friend, while
chatting over books, love and balance. If you follow my social media
handles, especially between the year 2016 through February 2019 you’ll
know I’m an open book. Most of my daily live pursuits have been documented openly
to balance out people’s keen interest in my life (that I’ve made public).
From struggling to pay rent, gaining admission, what I’m reading, my road trips, going through depression and recently, graduating; all these can be seen in a slide show on my
insta-stories, feed or timeline. So I took a break!
I am glad that break happened, because I started to re-evaluate what I
share, why I share it and if it matters that I do. So in June, while visiting
Evelyn at her apartment, we started that conversation about books, love and
balance, when my demeanor and social media presence came into conversation. While addressing me she posited, that although all stories matter, not all stories are beneficial
to be told because they affected the relationships I had, the way people viewed
me and also the value of my brand.
I wanted to argue but she was right,
because what I didn’t tell her was that a few months back those where my
exact thoughts, which resulted in me posting less on social media.
Let me take y’all back to the month of February!
So in February 7th while signing papers of a leave of absence to return
back to Nigeria, the narrative on social media was different; I had
posted a glittering green dress with a good face beat, responding to my
followers with exciting emojis. However, all the weeks leading up to that day had left me physically drained, my composure around my peers was off. One could tell that my situation was not good and that wasn’t a good temperament to be around–so I became withdrawn and I wasn’t invited for much (not like it happened ever). I was tempted to let out how I felt on social media, but for once, I realized that if God did not come through for me, this was not a problem man could solve.
Hence my birthday decision to allow my alternate universe (my social media) to do a different talking. I had racked up excuses in my head if people where to ask why I was home.
At the end of that day any situation I had was
sorted out (oh, God came through) and there was no pity party for me online; the perception
must have been, ‘Grace is goals’. It came as no surprise that the
lessons I learned that day would be reiterated months later while
chatting with Evelyn in her dim lit room.
“Grace, these are the questions to ask yourself before you share your sob
story online. You have to ask yourself, is the story reaching an
audience with the capacity to solve it?
does your brand matter to you?
and how many of such stories have you shared, for this to become negligent?”
Y’all I felt that! she didn’t have to say so much but her opinion was
really backed up by a book she read in her social network analysis
class. So in following weeks leading up to today, I have maintained similar deliberate
measures about what I share. My post are less sob stories, showing quirky side of me to information that empowers people and makes them think.
Now the gag is,
yesterday, I started to think about “Equipoise” or balance as people
call it, and where do we draw the line?
This story will have a part 2, leave your comments below.